Resources for Single Christians

I have decided

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I have decided to work out. I have decided to get a better job. I have decided to find that spouse. I have decided this is the year. My year.

I have heard people say many times “I have decided to do this or that.” They post a quote to Facebook, talking about what they want to see, yet nothing happens in their life. They continue their daily life with the same outlook, same foresight, to only find continual stalling of their decision. We even have some great Christian songs to help cheer the “decided” cause on:

I have decided to follow Jesus;
I have decided to follow Jesus;
I have decided to follow Jesus;
No turning back, no turning back.

Yet as we know, deciding gets us in, stewardship to the decision keeps us connected and growing. It’s like going to Nascar and you are asked to drive in the race. I’m sure you would be totally stoked, right? You put all the gear on, hop into the car and start the engine. You feel the power by just a simple push of a gas. You put the car in gear and pull out on to the track and approach the starting line. You have now decided to race. The light turns green and everyone steps on the gas. Everyone, but you. You are still sitting at the starting line. Hey, you decided, but didn’t act. Really sounds silly, doesn’t it? To approach the starting line, with the opportunity of a lifetime to race, yet you did nothing. Every day, you approach the starting line, but do nothing; day after day, year after year. You blame it on the rain, you blame on this or that, till finally you pick something new to decide and start the process over. We all have one thing in our life we have decided to do, and it turned into action. Some of you are incredible moms, dads, sisters, brothers; some are always on time for work at 6am, or maybe you make a mean cup of coffee. Take those moments of success where you made a decision, and work backwards in how you made it happen.

The biggest misunderstanding in Christian single circles is that of waiting on God. They think, Oh, I am waiting on God to bring me that husband, that wife, that job, that friend, that happiness. But we must be willing to take steps of faith into the unknown while making sure our decisions line up with our actions and God’s will. While you are “waiting,” God may be urging you to take a step towards him. He calls us to “take possession” of our promised land, not wait in the desert for him to bring it to us. He is out in front of us making a way and calling us to walk in that way. He is not catching up to us because we are so far ahead. If anything, he is constantly coming along side our insecurities and fear of failure to pull us forward.

Being a single person, we make a lot of decisions without outside influences. In fact, I would say outside consulting trusted family and friends, we make most of our decisions alone. Yet the decision is really worthless unless we follow through. How many decisions have you made that still lie dormant on the shelf of your life?

There are few steps to making what you want to happen, happen in your life. Many of us discount the process of bringing good into our life because it sounds a bit new age. Yet if I were to ask you your thoughts on gravity, or sowing and reaping, you would have a quick answer. So it is with decisions, because they were set from the foundations of creation and you have to be willing to go out past the decision and go get it.

Decide It
Deciding is really the first step. Most of you have decided many things in your life. We decided that Christ is God – we aren’t. If you are reading this you most likely made that decision at some point in your life; some at 8 years old, others 80. As I mentioned earlier, the decision gets you in, stewardship to the decision keeps you growing. So now that you have decided, you need to set your mind.

Think It
“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. “ (Philippians 4:8.)

Thinking about what you want really isn’t that hard, however more often, many tend to think about what they don’t want. Have you ever been on a dating site and observed a potential match’s lists of qualities they don’t want in a future mate? Clearly they are living in the past with negative experiences and have not figured out how to move forward to right thinking. Ever thought, Oh I just know this or that is going to happen, and it does? Good or bad, what you think about, you bring about. A person, who has right thinking, is focusing on what they want, not what they don’t want. They focus on it daily because attentive thoughts turn into beliefs.

Believe It
I have decided, I am thinking about it, now it’s time for the hardest part of this equation, belief. Belief is the driving force of everything in our mind and how it interacts with the reality of life. We go to work each day with the belief that we will get paid. If we don’t believe in gravity and step off a cliff without a parachute, we fall rapidly with only the ground to stop us. Everything we do is based on belief or the lack thereof. While I have faith that God will do what his word says, belief is the action part of faith that connects the ‘who’, the ‘will’, and the ‘do’ of our mind. It is the unwavering mindset that things will turn out as I see them and according to God’s plan for my life. It’s the unfounded beliefs that nothing good will happen, or nothing will change, that causes people to be stuck in ruts for 10, 20, 30 years.

One of my good friend often talks about God telling us to walk and he will order the steps (Psalms 37:23). Some of you have stalled and are waiting for something that only you can do. Belief starts the walking, without fear, because you have this unwavering mindset. You have to be willing to believe bigger than you can see all the time. No one would ever be a body builder if they didn’t have the belief without seeing the results. People, who are truly fit, are always pushing themselves mentally to go to the next level, on the belief that if they continue, they will see results. Why? Because the human body was created to respond to the training and building. It’s not magical or spiritual it’s a physical manifestation of creation. It’s the way God set it up.

“But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.” (James 1:6.)

Act on it
The fruit of deciding, thinking, and believing is action. It’s a natural momentum. It’s almost impossible not to fall into the pool if you start leaning over the edge. Gravity takes control. So it is with deciding, thinking, and believing. Action is that byproduct or the gravity. One last point; action is also about timing. We have to have the full momentum of everything in our lives working together to really make great things happen. It’s doesn’t magically happen. God set the world in motion and setup laws that govern every aspect of the world; from gravity to sowing and reaping. It’s why good things can happen to anyone regardless of if they have faith in God or not (Matthew 5:45).

You have to stop deciding and waiting, and start thinking, believing, and action will follow. I can promise you that if you consistently put this into practice; your life will change in moments rather than years.

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