Resources for Single Christians

7 Things Men Do That Make Women Run

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7 Things Men Do That Make Women Run – Okay guys; you want honesty? You got honesty. Here are the things you do that make us girls cringe, wince, raise our eyebrows and eventually want to run away from you.

It’s great when a guy tells you what you ought to do to win a woman’s heart, but you also ought to hear from us girls, since it’s our hearts that need to be won. So, I consulted some of my girlfriends, both single and married, and we put together a short list for you. I quoted them so you will hear firsthand what women really think about certain behaviors.

We appreciate when you take time to get to know us. But sometimes, as we get to know you, there are certain indicator lights that go off in our little brains that signal something is amiss – things we consider to be important in the grand scheme of things. So fasten your seat belts because you are getting a crash course on what makes us girls run. Here are the 7 Things Men Do That Make Women Run:

  1. Selfishness. In the beginning of a relationship, everyone puts their best foot forward. But in time, truth always comes to light and true selfishness always finds a way to surface. We can tell it’s all about you if you spend all your time doing what YOU want. You don’t serve others, sacrifice for others or spend money or time on others. One woman said, If he makes everything about himself, that’s a big red flag in my mind. Your relationship will just be about him and not about what you two can do together.
  2. Pride. Pride is one thing that really turns me away, says one woman. I can’t handle a man who can’t acknowledge he did something wrong or can’t be corrected. How does pride rear its ugly little head? First, your actions tells us, and two of the biggest are that you can’t apologize and you can’t submit to authority. That’s pride. When you can’t humble yourself to others because “they’re dumb,” or “jealous of you,” or whatever, you are really telling us about YOU – not them. Another indicator of pride is the “pride of life.” Meaning, you measure your success by all the stuff you’ve got, how great your body looks, how many pretty girls are texting you, blah, blah, blah. It’s really a turn-off to us girls.
  3. Lies/Deception. There are big, obvious lies, and then there are those little, insidious deceptions that make us girls uneasy in our gut. Like when a text comes and you suddenly grab your phone so we don’t see it. Or your story slightly doesn’t line up with the facts. Or you tease us with promises that never come true. Those little deceptions really make us girls uneasy and after a while they are hard to ignore. They eventually add up to one really bad character trait; dishonesty. And once we’ve had a gut full of dishonesty, we run.
  4. All Flash, No Substance. You don’t have to quote the whole bible to us, (in fact, that’s a little annoying) but come on guys, if you never talk about your prayer life, things that you are pondering, or what you’ve been learning from God lately, we assume it’s because you’re not learning anything. And if you’re not spending time with the deeper things of life, well, to be quite honest, that means the well just isn’t very deep and we will eventually get thirsty for deeper things that we can’t get from a shallow well.
  5. Co-dependence. Co-dependence reveals itself when you have a constant need for people and their validation. It is also known as “relationship addiction” and men demonstrate this when they can’t stand to be alone and become a serial dater. Co-dependency breeds insecurities and controlling behaviors which are relationship nightmares. (Want a little tip guys? Your fb page tells us if you have insecurities. I personally hate muscle pics, excessive selfies, and anything that is attention-seeking. Attention-seeking behavior indicates insecurity (if not desperation) and that’s really unattractive. Co-dependents have to control outcomes, which means they have to control those around them. One woman said, Controlling indicates a lack of confidence as well as distrust in others. No-one was created to be controlled.
  6. Lack of ambition. Ambition simply means that you have vision. We know you have vision when you tell us what your goals are and what you are doing to get there. Whether it be starting a new business or saving up for a mission trip, we know you’re moving forward and we will get to enjoy the adventure with you!
  7. Can’t Connect/Communicate. There are two extremes here: Those men who leave us guessing what is on their mind and those men who tell everything that is on their mind. First, women like to be heard. We feel heard when you look at us while we are speaking and you thoughtfully listen. It doesn’t mean you have to give some big oratory report back to us. Sometimes, even just a gentle hug lets us know you heard us. On the other side of the universe are the men who over talk, and over communicate. One woman’s view is, Opinionated men tire me out really quick. They have an opinion on everything and it’s usually negative. Both extremes prevent any kind of true connection with a woman. And we love connection.

So there’s the big 7. Girls, feel free to add more comments that can be helpful to guys. We want to give our brothers our best advice so all our lives can be fulfilling and joyful.